


To Run Towards the Horizon

by SkyLeaf



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Apologies, Episode: s08e01 Launch Date, F/M, Friendship, Gen, Love Confessions, M/M, Pining Keith (Voltron)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-27
Updated: 2020-05-27
Packaged: 2021-03-03 05:54:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,204
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24409894
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SkyLeaf/pseuds/SkyLeaf
Summary: As they sat on top of the Black Lion during what might be their last day on Earth, it was clear that while the universe might be preparing for what could very well be its impending doom, life continued with all its trivial worries and problems.
Relationships: Allura/Lance (Voltron), Keith & Lance (Voltron), Keith/Shiro (Voltron)
Comments: 4
Kudos: 25





	To Run Towards the Horizon

**Author's Note:**

> So, after silently watching the show and fandom and reading fanfiction about it for over a year, I finally began to actually write about these characters :)
> 
> I hope I have done a good enough job at portraying them!

The pans clanged against each other as Lance stepped out into the golden rays of the setting sun, the disharmonic sounds of metal hitting metal echoing around him as tried to clear his mind. Thinking—or, if Lance was honest with himself, worrying—about what was to come would not do him any good, not when Coran seemed to have already claimed to have a monopoly of that emotion.

As the breeze brushed past him, Lance could almost still hear how Coran’s voice had risen as he had listed all of the qualifications he expected Lance to have conjured up in the span of time that had barely been enough for him to understand that this was really happening, that he had not imagined things or dreamt of some universe where Allura might have said yes. It had happened, right there, in the little reality that seemed so small when compared to Pidge’s theories about the true span of space and time through all the different universes they would have to protect. Looking up at the sky, Lance could not remember having ever felt so small. It was true that he had felt alone when he had first arrived at the Garrison, not that he would ever have admitted it, but this, looking up at the sky and knowing that there were so many other planets, so many other realities, so many other versions of himself out there, that was something else entirely.

What were they doing, all those tiny Lances? As much as he hoped that they might be happy, surrounded by the little family he had found in the bond with the other Paladins, their heart beating just a bit faster whenever they looked at Allura, Lance could not quite shake the feeling that, for all the horror and danger that accompanied the title of Paladin, it had required more luck than what was able to be replicated to send him headfirst into the universe. It would not have been possible for the other versions of himself to have achieved that, Lance was sure of that as he looked towards the sky. They might not know just what, but there had to be an empty feeling of loss, there had to be the pull of an unknown force, something in the back of their mind that kept on whispering that it was not quite right as they wandered the halls of the Garrison. Were they lonely? Lance had to believe that he would have been, had it not been for Voltron and all it had brought along with it.

He had barely given such a reality a thought, envisioned where he might have been had it not been for the discovery of the Blue Lion, before something else entirely caught his attention.

A figure was sitting on top of the Black Lion, backlit by the setting sun.

Holding up his hand to try to block out the sharp sting of the sun, Lance could just barely make out the outline of someone sitting at the edge of the Lion’s head, one leg pulled up in front of them as they took in the sight of the canyon that had been the background the day they had first left the Garrison. Even if he had not noted the way the mullet moved slightly in the wind, Lance only knew one person who might possibly have decided that spending what might very well come to be their last day on Earth all alone on top of the Lions that had taken them into battle so many times would be a good idea.

Keith did not hear him as he climbed up to join him, or at least that was how Lance chose to interpret the loud silence between them. At least the animal Lance had yet to decide was more dog or wolf turned to look at him, ears twitching as it seemed to arrive at the conclusion that he was not a threat, instead settling back down against Keith’s side with a soft growl.

“Hey… Keith?” and just like that, Lance could feel how the resolution not to let Keith continue with his self-imposed exile evaporated, leaving him to stand there, a couple of steps keeping him from joining Keith at the edge of the Lion, instead sensing how the air between them grew heavy with something that was not quite awkwardness, but also did not hold the easy atmosphere of the banter and insults that had been commonplace in space. Still, Lance had not climbed up onto the Black Lion, moved further out into the open while wearing half of the kitchen equipment that could be found within the Garrison just to give up now, so he forced himself to push back the creeping sense of doubt, instead moving forwards, letting his legs dangle over the edge of the cold metal as he looked towards Keith. He seemed intent on continuing to stare straight ahead, not getting up to leave, but also not doing anything to acknowledge his presence. Lance forced himself to take that as a good sign as he continued. “Are you all right?”

He had not quite expected for Keith to answer, having halfway prepared to say something about the sunset, a light joke about how travelling through space and seeing entire galaxies and solar systems for himself really made it all seem a bit less impressive, but Keith brought an end to what appeared to be his carefully rehearsed silence before Lance even got the chance to begin.

“Yeah.” Keith tapped against the head of the Lion, a quick, uneven rhythm that told Lance everything he needed to know. “I am fine. Just, you know, taking this opportunity to spend some time beneath my own sun, clearing my head and all that, having a bit of time with Kosmo.”

The wolf raised its head at what Lance now knew to be the mention of its name. But still, as much as Lance wanted to look down at Keith’s newest companion and tease him about having picked that name, with the way Keith was not quite able to hide a shadow of a frown, the way a slight crease appeared between his eyebrows for a fraction of a second before he was able to bring back the blank expression, Lance found that the remark died in his throat long before he would even have the chance to say it. Instead, he looked towards the horizon as well, tried to guess just what Keith was looking at, if there was anything out there at all or if it was really all just to avoid having to make eye contact.

“Keith, you might be good at pretending to be this emo loner who doesn’t need anyone to worry about him, but if you think that I can’t see that you don’t really mean any of what you just said, you are not giving me enough credit. I mean,” Lance threw up his hands, at once gesturing both towards the universe around them and their immediate surroundings, “we spent months in space! You, I, Allura, Pidge, Hunk, Coran, and Shiro, we all spent so much time out there with no one but each other to talk with—and now, I can look at you and tell you that you are lying to me. So what is it then?” nudging Keith in the side with his elbow, Lance tried to soften what he could hear was coming dangerously close to being an accusing tone of voice with a laugh. “Are you upset about that show they made about us? Because I promise you that everyone who has ever met you knows that you aren’t like that—or at least they will realise it after spending a second next to you.”

Lance waited, counting down to the moment where Keith would look back up at him, the hint of annoyance unable to completely hide the little hint of a smile that would tug at the corners of his mouth when he told him that at least the people who had made the show would not have to worry too much about their characterisation of Lance, just make him as annoying as possible.

But that did not happen. Rather than reacting, Keith simply kept on staring into the horizon, Lance feeling how his shoulders became just a little bit heavier with every passing second, a sense of exhaustion that could not be blamed on the pans on his shoulders wiping the strained smile from his face.

“It’s Shiro, isn’t it?” he had meant for it to be a statement, to let Keith know that he was not going to leave him alone on top of the Black Lion for the rest of what might very well be their last day on Earth, but with the way Keith tensed at the mention of Shiro’s name, Lance found that he could not keep those last two words from joining the first.

For a moment, the only sound to break the silence between them was that of the wind being broken by the massive structures all around them, Lance and Keith both staying stubbornly silent. Counting to himself, Lance tried his best to ignore the urge to readjust the clothes he was beginning to suspect was as much like traditional Altean courting vestments as a butter knife resembled a sword. If Keith wanted to try to deter him from prying into his personal life after they had just spent months in space and Keith had gone to sit alone on top of the Black Line, then it was time to show him just how much patience Lance could possess when it mattered.

The thought that, truly, it would not be his patience, but rather his date with Allura that would have to cut the moment short was there, trying to make itself heard, but he showed it back down. There was nothing to worry about; if Lance had learnt anything about Keith while in space, it would have to be that the idea of Lance trying to get him to tell what was wrong annoyed him more than actually admitting the truth.

It would appear that he had been right, for it only took a couple of minutes before Keith, letting out a deep sigh, clearly trying his best to convey just how little he wanted to do this, relented. “Yeah,” he mumbled, the tempo of the rhythm increasing a little with the sound, “it is about Shiro.”

In the setting sun, Lance was not sure if the glimmer he saw in Keith’s eyes had been real, or if he had merely seen the light reflected. For a moment, Lance almost did not know what he would have preferred, whether it would have been better if he really had just imagined things and that, in a moment, Keith would tell him that he had had a minor argument with Shiro, something small, something they would be able to fix in a minute, wrapping a nice bow around the connection Lance could see in the space between the two of them whenever they were in the same room but lacked the necessary words to describe in detail, before he and Allura would have to leave.

But then, almost like that confession had been the tiny hole that allowed the water to break through the dam, Keith took a deep breath and continued. “It’s just… ever since he came back, it feels like he has been avoiding me.” just like the uneven tapping against Black, the words came quicker and quicker, Keith not giving Lance a moment to interject a question or a comment. “First, it was the journey home, and, I mean, that was strange and all, but I assumed that it might just be a case of him… I don’t even know what I thought, and then it just continued, Shiro turning around in the hallways, barely looking at me when his position at the Garrison would force him to speak to me, all these ‘Paladins’’s and ‘Black Paladin’’s, and it’s just—”

Finally, Keith had to pause to breathe, Lance seizing the chance to get a word in with both hands. Doing his best to keep his voice light, to come somewhat close to a cheerful expression, he moved a couple of centimetres closer to Keith, not even bothering to wait to see if it would lead to the push he had expected ever since he sat down for fear of that being what would allow Keith to continue his rambling. “Keith, my pal, my buddy, my friend, my brother in arms, have you thought about why that might be?”

There was a second where Lance was almost sure that this might be what would finally earn him a harsh glance and the order to leave immediately if he did not want to be pushed from the Lion, that the question rather than the little sarcastic remarks about him would be what would be the last straw.

With an expression so stony that it almost made it seem like Lance should get up and prepare for another attack from yet another Galra outpost that had yet to accept defeat, the tense line of his shoulders not leaving any doubt about how all that separated him from getting up, ready to fight, was a fraction of a second, Keith finally turned to meet Lance’s gaze. “What do you mean?”

“Well, it’s just… the last time the two of you spent more than a couple of seconds alone together, he almost killed you—”

He did not get to finish the sentence. Of course he didn’t. Lance should have known that much. Keith had descended down like an avenging angel, appearing out of nowhere to defeat Sendak, somehow knowing just where to find Shiro after the ship had crashed, whirling up enough dust to make the Lion all but blind; of course he would not give him a chance to finish the sentence.

“Shiro didn’t do that—Haggar did! Haggar did it with her magic and her manipulation and everything she put Shiro through back when he was first captured by the Galra Empire! She is the one to blame for all of that, not Shiro, and I—”

“Whoa!” Lance held up his hands in what he hoped would be a placating gesture. As fun as it might have been to try to rile Keith as they flew through space while being careful to keep an eye on the line he knew better than to cross, sitting here, looking at the way Keith had clenched his jaw, fingers already twitching for what Lance knew would be a weapon that would allow him to go out and track down anyone who might even get the idea of blaming Shiro for what had happened inside the facility, Lance could not ignore how a sense of anxiety that was entirely different from the fear that accompanied a fight in Voltron made his throat feel dryer in seconds. “Keith, I know that! Shiro is not to blame for what happened back then, but you have to realise that, as much as we might think that that is the logical conclusion to arrive at, that will still not be enough to keep Shiro from blaming himself.”

And just like that, almost like the one time Pidge had asked him to hold a balloon she had to use for some project, only for Lance to accidentally let it become caught in the zip fastener of his jacket, the balloon becoming a sad piece of plastic within moments as it was ripped apart, all the anger seemed to disappear from Keith’s posture, leaving him to slump over a little, his hand finally resting against the head of the Lion.

“Oh.” the word was barely more than a whisper, but with how Lance had already seen the way Keith’s expression had changed from righteous fury and that kind of determination that would no doubt have led him to try to pay a visit to anyone who might have tried to pin the blame for the scar that cut across his face on Shiro to dejection he would never have been able to miss it. “I… I had not even— thought that he might have believed that… that…” Keith’s voice faded away, the breeze around them drowning out the last couple of syllables.

“I know.” there was a moment where Lance debated whether or not to try to put his arm around Keith. Deciding that he would prefer to not have to fight to keep it attached to the rest of his body, he stayed still, instead doing his best to keep his tone of voice light. It was all he could do, to try not to let the situation change even more from what it had been like when they had all been in space, back when he had been able to look at the Paladins around him when they would prepare to fly into battle with Voltron and think that perhaps, just perhaps, it was not a matter of him having lost his entire family when he had agreed to escape through the wormhole, but rather a question of gaining another family as he tried to save his first, but with Keith looking like he was trying his best not to cry in front of him, blinking furiously, at least Lance was able to convince himself that it might be helping. “I know; it is not right that he would think that, not when you, I, and everyone who has ever met him know that he would never do that. But, Keith… we moved Shiro’s consciousness into the body of the clone. It would only make sense for him to have the clone’s memory. And I mean, if that is the case, can you blame him for avoiding you? If all you could see when you looked at him was the fight you had been thrown into when someone had seized control of you and used your body to attack him, would you not also try to avoid him?”

“I—” Keith began, and Lance could almost hear how he was prepared to deny it all, to look at him and tell him that, no, Keith would have stayed. The worst part of it was that Lance was sure that Keith would at least have been able to make it somewhat convincing, pouring all the desperation and pain of not being able to help Shiro into trying to make Lance forget about everything he had learnt about Keith and his unwillingness to talk about his own emotions. But he only managed to say that one word before his voice broke, making it all too clear to Lance that the glimmer he thought he had seen in Keith’s eyes really had not merely been the sun after all as he forced himself to continue, “is that true? Does he—does he remember that? Does he remember the fight?”

It was in moments like those, the first time he had seen Keith after he had returned from the facility, pain in his eyes and with a red scar running diagonally from his jaw to just below his eye, the times he had been able to see him through Red’s eyes, Keith staring at the universe around them with a unreadable expression, and now this, with Keith crying silently next to him, not reaching up to wipe the tears away, but clearly trying his best to suppress his sobs, that Lance was reminded of the fact that he did not know the details of just what had happened inside that cloning facility, only what the outcome had been and the little details Shiro had been willing to share with them when Pidge had looked up from the wound to, with a look in her eyes that told them that she already had an idea of the answer, ask what had caused such a deep and raw cut. Maybe he would never know. As Lance sat there, trying to find the magical combinations of words that would not make everything even worse, he truly hoped that that might be the case, that he would be able to never have to hear the full story of what had taken place there.

“I…” Lance hesitated. If Veronica could have seen him now, if she could have looked at him in that instant when he tried to gauge just what words would be the best to describe what had become their reality, he was certain that he would have seen the little twinkle in her eyes that was a clear sign that she was thinking, trying to figure out a way to help him as well. But she was not there. Save for Kosmo, he and Keith were the only ones there, and with Keith still blinking, trying his best to force the tears to retreat, there would not be anyone to tell him what to do or to tell him that all of it—war, pots, pans, and the conversation he had had with Coran that Lance still did not know what to think of and all— would be all right in the end. So Lance pushed back the doubts, pulling up his shoulders in a tiny shrug. “To tell you the truth, I am not sure to what extent Shiro shares the clone’s memory. I just know what Allura has told me about the process, that Shiro’s consciousness must have… melted with the clone’s—it is still Shiro.” seeing the way Keith’s eyes widened in alarm, Lance hurried to dispel the fear he saw reflected in them. “We have Shiro; we got him back from within the Lion. But… the clone, according to Allura, there must be some shreds of its consciousness left.”

He was almost grateful when Keith did not ask him why he had to hear that from Lance, why Allura had not gone to him to tell him about the possible consequences of what had been a desperate attempt at saving Shiro. Perhaps once, back before Shiro had disappeared from within the Black Lion, only to show up after what seemed like ages, only to reveal that their Shiro had died, that the person they had accepted onto their team had been a clone, said clone being controlled by Haggar and forced to turn his weapon towards Keith, Lance would have made a joke about how no one really wanted to be the one to have to bring him bad news, not with how Keith had a habit of lashing out at anyone who brought him a reason to mourn. But now, Lance simply remained silent as he watched Keith connect the dots himself, his mouth settling into a thin line as he arrived at the correct answer.

“I see,” Keith said at last, some of the tension leaving his voice, “so what you are saying is that… that Shiro looks at me and is reminded of the clone, of everything the clone did?”

“I mean, I don’t know what Shiro is does and does not remember. I am just telling you what I think.” perhaps Lance should not have been surprised when Keith looked at him, genuine disbelief apparent on his face, but that was nevertheless the emotion that settled into every cell of his being, seeping into his voice as he continued. “No one wants to go and ask him about it. I mean, quiznak, Keith, did you really think that despite the fact that you, his best friend, clearly has not spoken with him about it yet, someone else would do it? Because if that is the case, then let me tell you right now that none of us want to be the one to go ask Shiro if he might remember what happened after you went after him, possibly bringing up memories that might otherwise have stayed hidden!” Lance had heard how his voice had grown in volume, but even then, the frustrated yell still managed to take him by surprise, echoing through the air around him with such force that it felt like the wind would be able to carry it past the mountains in front of them.

Going directly against everything Lance had come to expect from him over the months, Keith did not react, neither looking at him with that kind of annoyed expression that so clearly told him that the only reason he did not respond was that he did not even deign himself to doing that or outright throwing an insult right back at him. Instead, he simply stared out over the canyon for a while before finally moving to bring an end to the silence.

Reaching out to pat Kosmo, the wolf wagging its tail in response, Keith mumbled a handful of words. “I am sorry.”

The little ball of emotions that were not quite anger or annoyance disappeared within moments. Sitting there, on top of the Black Lion, looking out over the canyon as the sun drew long shadows behind them, all Lance could think of when he envisioned the world around them was Voltron. Voltron flying through the air, landing on planets that were cheering for them the moment they freed them from the Galra, all seven of them connected through more than just the Lions.

“You have nothing to apologise for. I—I didn’t mean it that way, it is just… Keith, the first time I saw you after… well, after what happened between you and Shiro, I think that all of us had to come to terms with the fact that you might have died.” Lance did not have to look at the way Keith raised an eyebrow to know what his question would be, so, not giving him the chance to ask, Lance added. “I know, I know, all right? I know that I should have realised that we are all mortal and able to die long before that, back at the Garrison or at least before I agreed to pilot some unknown mechanical lion to wage war against an empire that had been in power for ten thousand years, but I suppose that I really did not realise that before we had you and Shiro back and saw, well, just how close both of you had come to dying. Do you know what I mean?”

Keith nodded. “I do.” then, sending Lance a weak smile that should not have made him feel as happy as it did, he added. “Your eloquence made it all so clear to me.”

Try as he might, Lance knew that everyone, himself included, saw his attempt at seeming indignant for what it really was. “Hey, I will have you know that I once took a class on poetry back in high school!”

“Sure you did!” Keith returned the laugh, and for a couple of seconds, Lance was almost able to convince himself that that was it, that the wounds they had both sustained ended there. But then Keith’s smile faded, once again replaced with that empty expression as he fiddled with the hem of his jacket. “I… Lance, can I trust you not to tell anyone about this?”

For once, Lance did not hesitate for a moment before nodding.

“Anyone,” Keith continued, his voice growing tighter, “and that includes the other Paladins as well.”

Oh. For a moment, Lance felt the hesitation set in, the little voice in the back of his head reminding him of Allura, Allura and the way she made the world seem a little less complicated just by existing, tying all of them together to form the heart of Voltron. But a single glance at the way Keith had returned to tapping an uneven rhythm against the Black Lion made the decision for him, Lance nodding once more. “I promise you that I will not tell anyone.”

It took a moment before Keith responded, but when he did, Lance could almost see how he had to gather up the strength to open up his mouth and speak. “Thank you.” the words were hushed and before Lance got the chance to ask if he had heard correctly, Keith had already continued. “Look, I don’t know how much you know about…” a pained expression flashed across his face. “about the fight, but there came a point where I truly believed that I would die if I was not willing to let go of Shiro, that it was a question of Shiro or survival. I should have chosen survival, I should have chosen it for everyone who might need Voltron, for everyone who needed help in their own fight against the Galra, but—”

“You chose Shiro,” Lance said, finishing the sentence for him. The conclusion was not the result of the fact that, clearly, with Shiro still there with them, that must have been the case, but rather the obvious continuation of all Keith had told him without uttering a single word, all he had let Lance know every time Lance had looked at him over the years to catch him looking at Shiro. “In the end, you decided that if there really was no other choice, then you would prefer to die with him. That was what happened, wasn’t it?”

“Something like that,” Keith mumbled, “though,” frowning slightly, he looked at Lance, “how did you know?”

Lance shrugged. In that moment, it felt like it was all he could do. “Because I can see how the two of you look at each other. Because I have spent years with you. Because I know what I would have done if I had been forced to pick between even the flimsiest hope of saving Allura and ensuring that I would survive.” gesturing towards nothing in particular, Lance tried to force out a laugh only to hear how the sound died in his throat. “Take your pick.”

In front of them, the sun disappeared behind the horizon, leaving them in the special kind of darkness that was interrupted by the ever-present light of the Garrison and all that it represented, a little torch that would have to warm and protect them from the night. Around them, Lance could see and hear the signs of the countless of lives that were all hidden away within the walls of the Garrison, two figures standing close to the entrance of the base, already turning to head back inside, having evidently only gone outside to get a chance to enjoy the last bit of sunshine, a laugh rising up from below, the sounds of machinery whirring around them.

Against all of that, it almost seemed banal to sit up here and worry about something that, when compared with the battle that was still waiting for them, must seem trivial, and yet, Lance found himself hanging onto Keith’s words as he slowly shook his head. “In that case, I suppose I will have to pick the last explanation.”

“Oh,” Lance said, the word escaping him before he got the chance to think about what he was saying.

“Yeah. Oh,” Keith repeated, a humourless laugh making its way out into the air along with it, “indeed. Oh.” there was a second where it seemed that that might be the end of it, but the next moment, Keith continued, the words filling the night between them. “You know, all the times I have lost him already, I at least had the luxury of knowing that it was only a psychical separation, that it was only a matter of me having to figure out where he was and then rescuing him. I know that it must sound horrible, but, in a way, that was actually easier to deal with. Tracking down Shiro and beating up any guards I might have to get past to get to him, I can do all of that. But emotions and all of this…” making a vague gesture in front of him, Keith appeared to give up on his struggle of finding the right word, a frustrated noise escaping him, “ _mess_ , I don’t know how to handle that.”

He should say something. Lance knew that much, knew that now was his moment to look at Keith and tell him that everything would be all right in the end. And maybe he could have done that. Maybe Lance could have told that lie and convinced Keith that although they still had yet to defeat both Haggar and her magic and Honerva and her unyielding desire to take whatever she wanted to possess, they would come out on the other side without having lost parts of themselves. But every time he tried to, Lance found that he lacked the strength to do more than just that, and so, he remained quiet.

Shooting him a quick glance, Keith raised an eyebrow. “Aren’t you going to tell me that that was what you expected of me?”

Instantly, the mixture of anger, sadness, and fear was replaced with the sensation of guilt making his chest tighten, almost making it seem like the air was being forced out of his lungs into the little word. “Keith… I—I am sorry.”

“What?” if Keith had wanted to make the guilt grow even more intense, he was doing great. The look he sent Lance, however, the way he honestly seemed confused about what he was talking about, made it clear that that was not the case. “What do you mean you are sorry?”

“That I am. Sorry, I mean. Sorry about everything. About those comments about how I got the chance of a lifetime because you left the Garrison after the Kerberos Mission, about those remarks I should not have made, and just about everything I said after Shiro… disappeared. Mostly about how I refused to let go of that stupid grudge.”

“Oh,” Keith said once more. There was not a single drop of pretence to be found in his voice as he looked over at Lance, the clear surprise only serving to make the guilt sit a little heavier in Lance’s stomach, “it… it’s fine. Don’t worry about it.”

“No way am I not worrying about it! Keith, you are my friend—don’t interrupt me, it can’t be that big of a surprise to you that I do actually care about you, mullet and all—so of course I am going to feel bad over telling you that I was glad that you had dropped out. I mean, yeah, I might not have known exactly why you had to leave the Garrison back then, but it was still a shitty thing to say. The fact that it was because of Shiro and that mission only made it worse. Not even to mention everything I told you back when Shiro disappeared.” Lance saw how Keith’s posture once again grew guarded, Keith pulling his shoulders up towards his ears, almost like he was waiting for the physical pain to hit him, but he continued nevertheless. As much as he did not want to continue the conversation, with the launch ahead of them and no way back, Lance knew better than to believe that he could keep on delaying the inevitable. “Keith, I… I am sorry about what I said… about how it was convenient for you, I mean. That wasn’t fair. More than that, it was a really… a really shitty thing to say, considering what had just happened.”

Keith shrugged. “I guess it was.”

And that was enough. The little gesture and the admittance that Keith was not completely removed from the rest of them, after all, was enough to keep Lance from turning around the way he had been about to, instead making him stay there on top of the Lion, only keeping half an eye on the watch, the rest of his focus instead turned towards the way Keith was still sitting with his hand planted on the cold, metallic surface of the Black Lion, his index finger still tapping against the surface of the Lion.

“You…” keeping his gaze fixed on the jagged line of the mountains against the sky, Lance struggled to find the words, “you love him, don’t you?” the question was unnecessary, Lance knew that, the answer to it already being present in the memories he had of the two of them together. But still, with the way Keith had left them, gone to spend their last day before the launch on top of the Black Lion with only his wolf to keep him company, it would not have felt right to have continued on with the assumption without ever taking the time to ask him directly.

There was a moment where it almost seemed that Keith was going to ignore the question, letting what could barely be called a secret continue to exist, but at last, he nodded. “Yeah, I do.” a soft sound that Lance only recognised as a muffled laugh a second later made Keith look younger, almost erasing the years he had spent in space. “For a long time, actually.”

“Before we formed Voltron?” Lance asked, already knowing what the answer would be.

Keith must have known that, for he simply sent Lance a short glance, the smile still tugging at the corners of his mouth, pulling the scar along with it. “Yes, before we formed Voltron.”

Perhaps Lance should have asked for more clarification. Maybe now was the moment where a friend would have asked if Keith had any idea about whether those feelings were reciprocated. But then again, most friends probably had not been pulled headfirst into a war that had lasted for millennia and spanned galaxies and universes, so Lance did not ask.

Instead, he looked at Keith and tried his best to will his brain not to imagine what Keith had gone through, not to envision Keith there in the cloning facility, there to find his friend, only to be met with the face of a friend, but the actions of Haggar, bringing him to a point where he had to choose between saving himself and the one he loved. But it was too late. The moment he tried to push down the thought, a new one would take its place, all the times they had been cornered in battle, Lance certain that he knew where Shiro was, only to then proceed to miss him by little more than a hand’s breath as he tried to shoot the Galra soldiers, Keith having moved without a sound to step in front of Shiro, the way Keith had always been the first to take Shiro’s side in discussions, and all the times Lance had gone to talk with one of them about something, only to find the other there as well, their excited conversations making it clear that he would have to wait, whirling through his mind as the puzzle was finally completed with that last addition to it.

“I am sorry,” Lance said once again, feeling more and more lost with every passing second, “it—I can’t imagine what it must have been like.”

Thankfully, Keith did not ask him just what he was referring to. With an expression on his face Lance was not sure he had ever seen, pure, unmasked pain settling into his features for a moment, Keith turned his gaze back to the landscape in front of them. “I hope you won’t have to.”

Picturing the way Allura had looked at him when Hunk had turned him back around to ensure that he would actually ask her, Lance could only agree with him. He might have spent years of his childhood envying Keith, first for his place in the better classes, then for his abilities inside the flying simulator, and at last for the fact that, even if they might not like him, the instructors all had that kind of look in their eyes whenever they would talk about Keith, the one that said that they were already imagining what great things he would be able to do, but this, the scar and the pain that so clearly did not originate from the burnt skin but rather from the actions that had led to it, was not something Lance could even imagine having to live through.

It felt almost like his heart had travelled from its right position to instead rest in his throat when Lance broke through the silence again. “Are you going to tell him?”

Once again, Keith tore his gaze from the night sky to instead look at Lance. “How do you know that I haven’t already done that?” his voice was controlled, perfectly even, but behind all of that, Lance was still certain that he could hear the attempt at a joke. Leave it to Keith to think that that, the sad reality of how it was obvious that he had not, would be an appropriate joke for a moment like this.

Still, if that was what he could get, Lance would not question it. Instead, he welcomed the attempt at making the atmosphere just a little lighter, mirroring the silent laugh as he looked at Keith. “I am afraid that I will have to give you a reused answer: because I have seen you two together. I have seen the way you act around him and the way you look at him. I know that you haven’t told him, and knowing you and your track record with handling these kinds of emotions, I know that you are not going to, which is why I am telling you right now that it would be for the better if you did.”

“But—”

“Keith, I swear, if you are about to tell me any variant of the phrase ‘but I don’t know if he feels the same way about me’, I am going to kick you off this Lion and then deal with being killed by a couple of tons of angry space Lion later.”

That finally earned him a full laugh, Keith leaning back slightly to allow the sound to escape. As Keith sat there, both hands planted behind him to balance himself, Lance could almost force himself to forget about all the other things Keith might have been about to say, about all the very real reasons he might have for not wanting to tell Shiro. But it was only almost, the memory of how red the scar had been when they had first seen Keith after the battle, the deathly pale look on his face only serving to make it seem even more brutal, still there beneath it all.

“In that case,” Keith laughed, seemingly unaware of how Lance’s thoughts were spiralling, “I will do my best not to say that. Wouldn’t want for Earth to lose two Paladins at the same time, right?”

“Right,” Lance said, doing his best not to think of what a world where the clone had been able to fulfil his mission would have been like, “I mean, me not even getting to actually go on a date with Allura before I die after my heart began to beat so quickly when I asked her out that I thought I might die right then? Now that,” he nodded at Keith, “would be a real tragedy, one that they would write stories about for centuries afterwards. I can already imagine it, ‘The Tragedy of the Lion—how the atrocities of war and bad hair brought an end to what had scarcely begun’—it would be a masterpiece and a bestseller, I can feel it!”

To his relief, Keith responded with a snicker. “You sound like Coran when you talk like that.”

“Oh, don’t remind me of him.” as Keith sent him a questioning glance, Lance pointed towards what Coran had referred to as an integral part of proper attire in Altean culture but that Lance was still certain was a bucket and nothing but that. “Have you seen what he told me to wear for the date? I look ridiculous!”

“Well, to be fair, you always look ridiculous.”

“Ha ha ha,” Lance said, carefully keeping his expression deadpan for a moment before the laugh escaped him, Keith joining in a moment later.

It could have been like that all the time, Lance realised. If there was no war, if they had never become the only ones who would be able to defeat Honerva and all she represented, if it had not felt like an even bigger threat would arise each time they had defeated the last one, perhaps there would not be the growing divide between all of them. Maybe there would not have been that feeling of drifting apart. It was only natural that, once they were back on Earth, no longer alone in space, they would begin to gravitate towards their old life, but still. Lance had at least expected for Shiro and Keith to spend their last day before launch together. After all, he would be spending it with Allura.

“What are you thinking about?”

Pulled back to Earth by Keith’s voice, Lance considered the option of telling him for a moment. But only for a moment. With how Keith was looking at him, a hint of worry clear on his face, he knew that he did not have to know, not when Keith already had more than enough to think about.

So Lance shook his head, summoning a smile. “I was busy begrudging you the fact that you will not have to wear enough kitchen equipment to fit out a restaurant when you go on a date with Shiro.” all too aware of how Keith let out a strange halfway finished gasp, Lance continued. “Because I can trust that you are actually going to tell him, can’t I? When I leave for my date with Allura, you are not going to stay out here alone, right? You are going to find Shiro to actually talk with him about what has happened?”

“I…” running his hand across the smooth surface of the Black Lion, a whirlwind of emotions flickering over his face in the span of mere seconds, Keith looked nothing like the classmate Lance had spent so much time wishing would just leave the Garrison altogether. Rather, the person who turned to look at him, a determined look in his eyes, was the Keith who had saved all of them more times than Lance could count, the Keith who had had to fly the Black Lion when Shiro had vanished. That was the Keith who was sitting next to him, mustering up a small smile as he nodded, “I will.”

“You will?” Lance parroted instinctively, realising too late that that was perhaps not the wisest words to respond with.

Thankfully, Keith did not appear to take it as an insult, instead laughing slightly as he nodded once more. “Yes. I mean, I know that you are never going to let me live it down if I let you come back from that date to gush about Allura, only for me to tell you that I still haven’t told him.”

“You know me!” getting to his feet, Lance looked back down at Keith. Sitting there, he could almost convince himself that there would be other moments like this, that the feeling of having to say goodbye was just his fears rather than an actual premonition of impending doom. And for once, Lance was able to shove the last bit of uncertainness aside, instead reaching out to offer Keith his hand. “Are you coming? I have to leave now if I don’t want to be late for my own family dinner, but I kind of have to at least see you walk in the direction of the bridge before I will actually believe that you are going to tell Shiro.”

The smile tugged at the skin around Keith’s scar as Keith accepted the extended hand, pulling himself up. “What, you don’t think I am going to?” at his feet, Kosmo looked up at them, the blue stripe almost seeming to glow in the cold night air.

“Will saying yes ensure that you actually do it?”

“Lance, you know that that rivalry has been dead for ages.”

He did. Looking at Keith, feeling the weight that had been lifted from his shoulders the moment he had been able to admit that what he had done was wrong, Lance knew that. There was no levity in his voice when he answered. “Yeah, I know.”

Maybe Keith had realised why he had refrained from making another joke. Maybe he hadn’t. No matter what, fact was that he sent him a small smile, tilting his head slightly. “Why do you care so much about whether I tell him, Lance? All this time, you always seemed to look forward to the day when I would be gone, and now you are here, talking with me, rather than trying to readjust your bucket or whatever it is you are supposed to do before a date. Why is that?”

Part of him wanted for him to quip, to say something about how he was just looking out for those who really seemed to be in need of his expertise, but the overwhelming parts of his thoughts where what kept him silent for another couple of seconds as he tried to collect his thoughts.

At last, just as Lance saw Keith give up on getting a response to his question, he felt how the answer came to him. “Because you are my friend. Because all of the Paladins are my friends, and I want for them to be happy. I suppose it is also partly because, well…” Lance hesitated, having to swallow back the lump that had settled in his throat, “just… you both seem like you would be happier if you talked about it.”

When they had been younger, Lance had often got into what his parents would no doubt classify as serious arguments with Veronica about whether silences could be loud, Lance having reached the logical conclusion of that not being possible. It would appear that he would have to admit to Veronica that she had been right the moment he would sit down for dinner, for as he stood there, watching how Keith slowly took in the words, his face unreadable, the silence around them felt deafening.

When Keith brought an end to it, his voice was barely more than a whisper, and yet, there was no risk of Lance not being able to hear every word Keith was saying as he looked at him. “I think… I think that you might be right about that.” nodding a couple of times, the gesture seemingly meant more for himself than for Lance, Keith smiled at him, his gaze flickering upwards, up towards the bucket Lance had almost been able to convince himself might really be a sign of high status in Altean society. “If everything goes well, do you think you would let me borrow your hat?”

This time, Lance would not have been able to keep back the laugh if he had tried to. Reaching up to touch the edge of the bucket, he tilted his head to the side. “Keith, I promise you that you can borrow this hat all the time if you ask Shiro. Just don’t tell Coran about it, or I am sure that he is going to try to convince you to fill out a never-ending list of applications, saying that it is something you have to do if you want to be able to date anyone from Team Voltron.”

Kosmo wagged its tail as Keith muffled a laugh behind his hand. “Yeah, and after all the time I spent just gathering up the courage to even admit to myself that I—that I love Shiro… you are probably right about it being best not to let Coran know, at least until after I have talked with Shiro about this.”

“And now you are beginning to sound like the Keith I know.” he had meant it as a light-hearted joke, but the words had barely left Lance’s mouth before he realised the truth that could be found within them. As much as he had tried to ignore it, there had been a shift between them—between all of them, really—that had only grown wider as what had been there between Keith and Shiro seemed to have changed, Shiro moving away and staying distant. There was a long way left before they could return home, Lance knew that, and yet, there was still an undeniable feeling of hope blooming in his chest as a faint beep from his watch alerted him to the fact that he really had to get going. Looking back up, it was clear to him that Keith had heard it as well with how he had turned to look at the watch the moment Lance had pushed the sleeve of his jacket down to cover it again. “Keith, I—”

“I know,” Keith nodded at him, “go. Be with Allura, be with your family. I think I should also head back inside. After all, someone wise told me not that long ago that I have to let a certain someone know about how I feel.”

Try as he might, Lance could not find even the faintest trace of pretence in Keith’s expression as he smiled at him. But even then, he had to try one last time, so, shifting his weight from one leg to the other, Lance raised an eyebrow. “Are you sure?”

“Yeah.” Keith paused, looking almost like he too was considering it before repeating. “Yeah, I think I am. Go, have a nice evening, Lance, you need that. We all do.”

There were still so many things they had yet to talk about, scars less visible than the one on Keith’s cheek, but for now, it would be alright. That was the thought that went through Lance’s mind as he turned around, having already taken a couple of steps away from Keith by the time he looked back over his shoulder, smirking at him. “I am expecting to hear the full story of just what happened when I get back.”

Keith simply smiled at him, the silence of the night for once not feeling as empty as it had done before. The quiet was only broken when Lance had almost reached the Black Lion’s ear, Keith calling out after him. “Hey, Lance?”

“Yeah?” Lance turned around.

With the stars as small dots in the sky as the background behind him, it was almost easy to overlook Keith’s smile. But it was there, bright and full of hope as he looked at him. “Thank you.”

Mirroring the smile, Lance gave a short answer before turning back around. “You’re welcome.”

If they had been someone else, if they had been more like Pidge and Hunk, they might have said more than that, Lance even stopping to wish Keith good luck one last time before leaving. But they weren’t. They were Keith and Lance, and as such, Lance knew that Keith would understand why they separated there to go out and spend their last days on Earth looking to the future.

**Author's Note:**

> Just in case you were wondering, yes, the rhythm Keith created by tapping against the Black Lion was Morse code. With how close he and Shiro are, I have this headcanon that they would use Morse code to communicate when they didn’t want anyone else to overhear their conversation and since they have both piloted the Black Lion, I just thought that Keith would probably feel like he was still talking with Shiro when sitting there, even if Shiro had been avoiding him. Just what Keith said, however, is a decision I will leave to you, but if you have any guesses, I have created a sideblog for my obsession with Voltron on [Tumblr](https://reaching-the-stars.tumblr.com/), so feel free to send me a message there if you want :)


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